all i want is an apartment in a city and a decent job, a dog, wifi and a tv, and someone to have sex with

(via userbar)


I hope when you die you get to see your stats like how many times you laughed or told a lie or kissed or how many people loved you and how many people hated you and what you meant to people

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LETS GET HIGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!grades

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friends are supposed to make you feel good about yourself

just remember that

(Source: slimeeeman, via userbar)


*seduces the president so i can find out the truth about aliens*

(via userbar)

I wonder how many stranger’s stories we make it into? You know, maybe someone saw you in passing and told their friends about how pretty the girl in the lavender sweater was. Or maybe they overheard you say a joke and repeated it to their friend, confessing that they heard it from some guy at the store. 

(Source: bellecosby, via userbar)


do you ever just smell an old perfume, or hear an old song, or pass an old hangout spot and kinda break inside for a couple minutes

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hi my names jack. my previous blog relahvant was recently terminated and I lost 223,000 followers annoying, I know.
I now run this lame excuse of a humour blog so if you check it out and I make you laugh why not stick around and follow me, I’ve been known to occasionally be quite funny

following back tons


 click here to enter into a teenage boys mind

love this